By Patricia Lefave, Monophrenic

Let's try focusing on single, everyday incidents involving perfectly average folks and see if we can't integrate those confusing, amazing, mystifying estian/psychiatric/dysfunctional  opposites.

Now don't look for 'hidden' meaning because there IS none. The only thing 'hidden' from you is the perfectly obvious which you cannot see or hear as most of you 'normal' people have been well trained to deny it all and to engage in 'splitting.' So now look for the OBVIOUS meaning which I am telling you in a perfectly straight forward way in excruciatingly pedantic detail. What you are splitting is reality itself, what you are consciously aware of, from what you are not and in a 'them and us' mentality which takes the same events, experiences  or human traits and divides them into TWO different and opposing versions of them.

So let's focus on the daily drama which is said not to exist at all. This is quite the 'trick' isn't it?

First say this out loud, both as individuals, and then as a group;

A. I am one of the people, who are talking 'covertly' about the people who 'think' that people like me are talking about them. My behaviour is not 'covert' and I am only deluding myself that it is.

B. WE are the people who are talking 'covertly' about the people who 'think' that people are talking about them.

When we deny we do this, the people who claim it is being done are then invalidated for their perceptions and reactions. When going, or taken, to psychiatrists, for 'help,' the profession believes that the perception of you people doing all the talking (aka gossip mongering) is WRONG and therefore the emotional reactions to being treated like that and invalidated for it also wrong. Psychiatrists then create an alternate reality to accommodate their own beliefs and to explain away the GROUP phenomenon which also denies the reality as experienced by the patient.

“Reality' is then transformed into its opposite.

Now to integrate these opposites, you need to do a few basic things.

Take what I tell you is happening at face value.

Give up your loony group delusion that you 'normal' are somehow all magically 'hidden' in plain sight while acting out all day.

Among the many things I told psychiatry about my own case were these:

That university students were discussing me and that included doing observing and evaluating my perception of my own reality and character for me, and that bus drivers were discussing everything that was happening inside Homewood, their opinions on it all and questioning everyone else to get their take on it including a large variety of fare box Fannies and Freddies, many of whom were ‘graduates’ of the addictions unit. For this post thought let’s keep it nice and simple and not go beyond the first two.

One bus driver was on route #1 in those days of 1995. I ‘claimed that he was discussing me on the bus and that he was discussing me with a university type who once even asked him when I was two and a half FEET away, “Is this the young lady you were telling me about”?  The bus driver confirmed that for him and then, apparently by doing his ‘splitting’ act so that I would not know or understand them, the university type turned around, eyes glowing with amusement (as most involved tend to display) and the ever present little smirk on his face and said directly to me, “Hello there.”

Now despite the denial which THEY are in, not me, these two know exactly who they are and what I am talking about. I want them to know that their denial of their own behaviour IS what gets assigned a new value of ‘mental illness’ and then this ‘assessment’ goes towards the diagnosis which will be given to someone like me for telling the truth about what they do.

Now the ‘splitting’ is done in these little boys heads and then they project their own split onto me and I become the one who does not understand reality, rather then THEM. In other words they draw an imaginary dividing line between what I will see hear know and understand, and what I won’t, and then they treat me ‘as if’ their own delusion, now being projected and defended, was mine.

Next let’s look at the university students who stand at the fare boxes and discuss what is going on at the university and what they have heard everywhere with those same bus drivers. What you are doing is denied to exist by psychiatry as it ‘would not be reasonable for people I do not even know to be behaving this way.’ Therefore, psychiatry DENIES this group behaviour exists and then reframes my account of it as yet more of my paranoid delusions and hallucinated conversations. Psychiatry does this in an attempt to ‘make some kind if sense of things’ as THEY want to understand it according to their training, and they also do it to defend and protect the psychiatric status quo and just like the rest of you to try to keep from getting BLAMED for anything.

I am telling you that for as long as no one can be blamed, no one will ever understand the reality of this because everyone (almost) works very hard to conceal the truth.

See me, seeing you. Hear me, hearing you. Stop looking for 'hidden' meaning in what I say and see that you are only 'hiding' from yourselves. Own your own behaviour. Stop the splitting of reality, the projecting of it as your favourite defence mechanism, and the denial that you do it and just FACE REALITY.

We are all living in ONE reality. It is only two different points of view on that, not two DIFFERENT dimensions.

The truth will set us ALL free.

Grow up.